Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably seen or heard of those viral and terrible self defense videos that have been going around that “increase your survivability.” Dale Brown, the man in those Detroit Urban Survival Training videos, has been meme’d endlessly for his questionable techniques, and now he’s being called out by a UFC heavyweight.
“Everyone wants to fight @jakepaul but I wanna fight this gammon c*nt !!! @danawhite set it up unk yellah ,” Tuivasa wrote on Instagram, before explaining the call out.
“He’s the guy that does all this bloody videos.” Tuivasa said on The MMA Hour (HT: MiddleEasy). “I don’t even know his name. I just wanna fight the guy. He makes me angry. The guy that makes people go in circles when they’re attacking him. Yes, him. I wanna fight him.
“I don’t know. I just want to see if I can shoot him or if I can fight him properly. I don’t know if you can make me turn it circles,” he said. “I don’t know. I just want to see real, let the people know the truth. I’ll take the cop all day.”
Even those who haven’t trained martial arts readily know these self-defense techniques are bogus, which is why he’s been meme’d so much, but it’s doubly hilarious for those who actually know what they’re looking at.
From pinching the thigh to defend a guillotine, to his soccer kick defense that will only get your head smashed, it’s blatantly clear Dale’s “skills” won’t actually “increase your survivability.”
For the extra lulz, here’s a BJJ black belt and MMA fighter breaking down some of his greatest hits.
While we can have a good laugh at those memes, Dale Brown actually has students who believe him, and he’s likely to only give people false confidence that can get them hurt — or worse — in those situations.