"Let's see what the big boss is going to do." - Brazilian supermanager Ed Soares, with a line I like to use in the bedroom. (SporTV)
"My opinion is that he had his chance and tapped, he should go back to the end of the line. " - Soares, on Chael Sonnen. I wonder if this "back of the line" business applies to Lyoto Machida, 1-2 in his last 3 fights and a title shot on the horizon?
"We should recognize that Anderson only has around 4 fights left in his career." - Soares. Fool me once, Ed...
NOTE: THE WEEK IN QUOTES IS SATIRE. EXCEPT WHEN IT ISN'T.
THE WEEK IN CHAEL
"I got tunnel vision. I'm after the belt. Period. I'm not making any apologies or qualms about it." - Chael Sonnen (Studio MMA)
"And the rest of the cowards in the back that just want to get their faces on TV and don't want to carry any heavy water, I've got no time for those guys. All of them. Every damn one of them that isn't named Chael Sonnen is nothing but a coward." - Sonnen, water-carrier.
"When you're the greatest fighter in the world the day they've got a name for you. They don't call you a great fighter, they call you Chael Sonnen." - Sonnen. And if you're the worst fighter in the world, they call you Jason Reinhardt.
SUMMERING IN CROATIA
"You can tell by his face that the man is slow, that he is stupid and has the IQ of a child's shoe size." - Mirko Filipovic, on Chael Sonnen. European or American shoe size? (Some Croatian show that's on Youtube)
"Is he crazy? Obviously he is, but I'm not mad at him. It's just as I can't get mad at my eight month old son Filip." - Filipovic. Filip Filipovic?
"That man holds a PhD in idiocy. I'm only sorry that he is missing like 30 pounds because I would beat his ass so bad he would multiply three times." - Filipovic. Three Chael Sonnens? Make the match, Dana!
"One day I'm hoping to see him summering in Croatia, so I can iron his ass, so steam can shoot out his pompous ass." - Filipovic. "Right leg, hospital; left leg, cemetery" this is not.
BACK, BACK, BACK...NOT GONE?
"As I ramped up my training for UFC 141 my body locked up during training. It wasn't like the Lesnar fight but my back just tightened up and I froze." - Shane Carwin. I believe there's a [sic] that belongs in there, yes? (Shane-Carwin.net)
"I scheduled an MRI and the results showed that my disc in my lower back is into the nerves." - Carwin. That disc doubles as the Bloody Elbow web servers.
"My doctor gave me two options; retire and I could probably go on for a few years without surgery or I could undergo surgery and continue my career." - Carwin. And at 36 years of age with a history of back/neck issues and a steady career to fall back on, Carwin called it quits.
"I am scheduling surgery and I hope to return to the Octagon by spring or summer 2012." - Carwin. Well then. All jokes aside, good luck, but this seems doomed.
"And believe me, I will [expletive] die before I let this not happen." - UFC President Dana White, on the recently announced Arrested Development season and movie. (MMA Junkie)
"I told him that. 'Dude, you're the unluckiest guy I've ever met.'" - White. But the Dude abides? (USA Today)
"We've only been around ten years, Bob's been promoting fights for 120 years." - White, on Bob Arum. (MMA Weekly)
"The people from Bellator have never said anything about us. I have nothing to say about them either." - White, echoing the thoughts of the MMA media. (MMA Weekly)
"I think if Vince McMahon and I were able to sit down at the same dinner table and break some bread that we could come up with some kind of gameplan." - Brock Lesnar (ESPN)
"He'll enter with the label of being a prodigy, but I'll be stronger because of that." - Lyoto Machdia, rehashing quotes from 2005. (Sherdog)
"What are they going to do, [are] they all going to keep beating each other up and then having another shot at him?" - Michael Bisping, on the welterweight division. (Fighters Only)
"In the three bouts I lost, I felt like I could've won. But the win somehow eluded me. I felt I could do it. I had chances, but God's will was different." - Fedor Emelianenko. GOD HATES FEDOR. (RT.com)
"[It was] just kind of trying to finish it with one big shot. You need to learn those lessons. You need to learn those lessons early on." - Greg Jackson, on Melvin Guillard's performance against Joe Lauzon. Melvin has over 40 pro fights. It's a little late to be learning lessons. (Sherdog)
"I think there’s one guy on earth right now that I would look at and say to myself, ‘He could beat Hector.’ His name is Anderson Silva." - Bellator CEO Bjorn Rebney, on Hector Lombard. His name is also "Gegard Mousasi" and "Akihiro Gono." (Sherdog)