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Bloody Elbow Exclusive: Dumbest Man Alive Discovered

His name is Bill Simonson and what he wrote - for public consumption no less - is so off the mark and ghastly, one wonders how he has managed to avoid the Grim Reaper of Natural Selection this long in his life. Drink it in:

I think the world is about to end.

This mixed martial arts fighting craze has me doubting society. When a television network like CBS lowers itself to have barroom brawlers going at it in prime time, it paints a sad picture of the sports world we all live in.

When did we regress to the point that watching a fighter try to rip off a bloodied ear of another fighter was worthy of invading our living rooms on Saturday night?

Please don't tell me this is disciplined martial arts. You can hide it behind any name you want, but in the end this is animal-like brutality that has no rightful place anywhere.

These bouts are almost like human dog fighting minus the Michael Vick death march. On my national radio show Sunday night, a caller told me the sport was a "violence release for him."

Violence release?

Check this paper and your television today, and tell me we need more violence releases in this country. What is alarming about CBS settling into the gutter on this one is that the network doesn't care what happens as long as it gets ratings and advertisers. What next? Friday night gang fights? Monday night murders?

These brawls may have their place for the bloodthirsty fan on pay-per-view or at an arena, but keep these thugs off of my free TV.

To watch this sport get mainstream coverage tells me we are all numb to pain or borderline torture.

People tell me these brawlers are skilled fighters. Guess again. All I see are two guys grabbing, kicking and punching each other.

The sport of boxing is to blame for this MMA mess. Once that great sport lost its credibility, fans of controlled violence went looking for an outlet. They bottomed out when they found it with ultimate fighting, and 15 years later we have Saturday night brawls on CBS.

I'm sure there is enough mindless advertising money to fuel the production costs of these broadcasts. My guess is the MMA fan is the same fan who grew up with staged wrestling and then grew into enjoying real blood and violence.

This frightens me.

Am I the only guy who sees this?

The amount of errors, unfounded assumptions, incoherent asides, admissions of willful ignorance and apocalyptic proclamations makes it almost impossible to digest. I don't even know what else to say about it, really. Your turn.