FanPost

BECW 6:10 FINAAAAAALS Livethread

Aw shizz, we down to this

Howdy, shitbags and shitbaguettes! This here's the officially licensed and sanctioned BECW livethread for the Finals/Condit-Kampmann 2. If you have no idea what a BECW is, slap yoself, do a barrel roll, then go here. You should totally join up as this is a ridiculous amount of fun. Unless you're running this shitshow, because I think Spam and Zater stopped having fun like ages ago.

READ THIS RIGHT GODDAMN NOW FUCKHATS

WE NEED ONE MORE PERSON. If we get one more person, we're good. If we don't, we have to drop seven non-pickers. Recruit your friends. Reenlist Deo Wade. WE'LL TAKE RIDAH AT THIS POINT OKAY

Two teams enter. One team leaves.

The final is JDH's undisputed transgender bantamweight champions of the world, the Fox Blockers, against the indescribable and impossible to spell correctly Fuken Magi. The Magi who Fuk were dismissed after the draft as a shtick team, a group of personalities who, while entertaining, would absolutely implode as a team. We always get one. We Toquinho, Dogcunt Herpes, the list goes on. And they always shit the bed. Somehow, the Magi have cancelled the apocalypse and managed to not suck every dick imaginable. Congratulations, cockjugglers, you have surpassed all expectations.

As for the Fox Blockers, it's really not surprising to see JDH in the finals; dude's a GOAT candidate, always in the top 5 for the season, an admirable human being, and funnier than 8 out of 12 commenters. He's essentially cheating; JDH captaining a team is like having two first round picks.

3rd Place Final:
The Duane Bangzillians vs. Beauties and the Beard

5th Place Final:
Split Decision Pickers Anonymous vs. Can't Let You Do That Star Fox Fallon

7th Place Final:
Brad One Punch Wolf Picketts vs. 11 Inch Reach Advantage

Season favorites CLYDESTAFF and 11 Inches attempt to not suck at least a little. Like your mother. Zing!

The Tournament of Terrible

Bland Prix
Rank Team Name Wins Losses Total points
1 Ultimate Fighter Paternity Suit Lawyers 2 0 1165
2 Stephen Thompson's School of Stand-Up Comedy 1 1 1167
3 Rosenthal's Field of Dreams 1 1 1081
4 The Hands of the Judges 0 2 964

Matchups:

Rosenthal's Field of Dreams vs. Ultimate Fighter Paternity Suit Lawyers
The Hands of the Judges vs. Stephen Thompson's School of Stand-Up Comedy

Fucklawyers win the title of greatest shitty team with a win, but a good showing from the Dealers or the Shitty Jokes could throw everything off. Andy Anderson's team teamersons are the worst team ever. Nothing can change that.

A Personal Note From Me

I'd like to issue a hearty fuck you to Zane for missing picks TWICE this year. You are, by far, the most exemplary member of the BE staff.

A lesser fuck you also goes out to Andy Anderson for being (I think?) the second captain to miss picks.

Spamsheet

Link here!

A note for s7 Captains by Grand Executive Putin Figure Zachary Kater

You'll be emailed final rosters tomorrow morning. Draft is Friday. Also, I hear Duck is a great first round steal.

\The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.

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