KONICHIWA, SHITBIRDS. So I'm thinking the Octagon repainting crew is gonna be working overtime tonight, there gonna be some motherfuckin' blood up in there tonight. This is the livethread for tonight's UFC on Fox 8 Shenanigans. More importantly, this is the regular season finale for Season 6. If your team is on the bubble, this is do or die time.
A FRIENDLY REMINDER
H2H matchups. If you haven't yet, update your spreadsheet. If you can't find your spreadsheet to update this yet, kill yourself.
MATCHUPS AND PLAYOFF PICTURE
Split Decision Pickers Anonymous vs. The Hands of the Judges
Fuken Magi vs. Duane Bangzillians
SDPA pretty much has a bye week, they could all no-show and still make the playoffs. Hands of the Judges are even worse than Tim Burke's Real Name Team and could ejaculate +13s and still not get in. Magi/Bangzillians is much more interesting, and the Bangzillians could find themselves in the bland prix with a loss here.
Brad "One Punch" Wolf Picketts vs. Josh Rosenthal's Field of Dreams
Beauties and the Beard vs. Stephen Thompson's School of Stand-Up Comedy
Soog needs a huge win, whereas Lanky and Josh just need to win. Field of Dreams could squeak into the playoffs with a win.
Fox Blockers vs. Ultimate Fighter Paternity Suit Lawyers
11 Inch Reach Advantage vs. CLYDESTAFF or whatever it is
Sweet baby Jesus, did my team ever shit the bed this season. And I have to win by a fuckload, AND I have to do it against JDH's team of worldfuckers? Great. Fanfuckingtastic. We've got a few surprises up our shit-encrusted sleeves, but I won't lie, The Fucklawyers are proooobably fucked, whereas the Fox Blockers are definitely playing next week. Winner of Dick Jokes vs Star Cocks is definitely in, the loser gets a wildcard berth with a solid score.
WHO PUNCHIN WHO
Demetrious Johnson (124.5) vs. John Moraga (124.5)
Jake Ellenberger (171) vs. Rory MacDonald (170.5)
Robbie Lawler (170.5) vs. Bobby Voelker (170)
Jessica Andrade (134) vs. Liz Carmouche (136)
Michael Chiesa (155.5) vs. Jorge Masvidal (157.5)
Danny Castillo (155) vs. Tim Means (160)(!)
Mac Danzig (155) vs. Melvin Guillard (155)
Daron Cruickshank (156) vs. Yves Edwards (155)
Ed Herman (186) vs. Trevor Smith (185)
Germaine de Randamie (135) vs. Julie Kedzie (135.5)
That should cover everything. Facebook fights start at 4-ish, FX at 5, main card at 8. Don't gif-bomb, make lewd jokes about female fighters' gender, call each other cockjugglers, link to streams, or any of the other shit I've been banned for.