FanPost

A very special BECW message brought to you by Dana White....

The following fanpost as transcribed by the author contains material which may not be suitable for all viewers. Parental discretion is advised.

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via s3.fuel.tv

Listen up you bunch of fucking pussy hipster keyboard warriors, it's UFC President Dana White.

I normally wouldn't be caught dead posting on a fucking waste of screen space such as Bloody Elbow, but this was a special occasion. I heard about about your ridiculously pointless Bloody Elbow Civil War. Yeah I have the fucking internets. I'm RICH BITCH.

At first I was fucking excited because I thought you fucking mouthbreathers might possibly kill each other off for real, but no, you're all just making FUCKING FIGHT PREDICTIONS FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES.

At least those 12 year olds over at Mania are betting real fucking money.All 4 of them with their 10 different fake accounts. Good for you, you fucking sewer grate of a fucking community. FUCK.

I did notice you have teams that compete against each other in seperate divisions. Holy fucking bird shit, it's like a bunch of you fucking UG guys went to community college and a fucking dim glimmer of light went off between the fucking vacuum that exists between your ears. NOW MOVE OUT OF YOUR MOTHER'S BASEMENT FOR FUCKS SAKE.

There was one glimmer of hope in all this fucking pointless BECW nonsense because I know potential when I see it. There was one team that stood out to me, because just like fighters I know pickers. (I just fucking threw up in my mouth saying that). THESE FUCKING GUYS WANNA BE FUCKING PICKERS:

Dwbb2_medium

via couturierillustration.files.wordpress.com

Even though this fucking team banner looks like the work of a fucking drunken chimp with glaucoma(lawsuit coming your way Clyde), there's something about this team that says......IN THE FUCKING MIX. These fucking guys are the next Anderson Silva of fight pickers. I have no fucking clue what that means. That's one fucking prediction you can take to the fucking bank.

Also I like this fucking Captain Ron Swanson guy, he kind of reminds me of myself... when i was fucking poor and a nobody. No but seriously, Ron: BOXERCISE. You're all still losers, but at least you fucking WAR.

I have to go now. John Dodson is running amok at Chuck E. Cheese, and won't fucking leave. We've been chasing this fucking guy for 7 hours. DOES HE EVER GET FUCKING TIRED? ALSO FUCK JOLT COLA. Also I've been hearing rumors that Rampage is wearing these shoes into the cage tonight:

Reebok_411431_medium

via cdnl.complex.com

FUCK. I HATE MY LIFE. I HATE U ALL. Follow me on twitter and watch UFC on FOX 6 tonight.

Yours truly,

Dana White

\The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.

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