Jon Gruden's take on the UFC 142 Main Events
by DayGeaux on Jan 12, 2012 11:14 AM EST
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Bloody Elbow is known for getting high profile analyst to comment on upcoming events so I thought I'd track down one of the best high profile analyst in the business, Coach Jon Gruden.
Hello Bloody Elbow. Man, I gotta tell ya, THIS GUY (points thumb back up at himself) sure is lookin' forward to U-F-C 142. We get to watch some of the toughest, nastiest, animals go at head to head, mono e mono. I hope everybody is as pumped up as I am, MAN I CAN’T WAIT!
Let’s start with the middle weights. I tell ya, THIS MATCHUP, I call it THE BLINK because it you do that then you’ll probably miss the fight. First off, ya got this guy VITOR THE PHENOM BELFORT. Let me tell you about THIS GUY. 20-9 with with 14 (T) KO’s, he’s got a better completion rating than Tom Brady. This guy should change his nickname from the Phenom to the ENERGY SAVER because he’s always turning off lights.
Then you got Rumble Johnson. WHOA, LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS GUY. Anthony Johnson was the 2004 NJCAA national champion at 174 lbs., wrestling for Lassen College and was TWO TIME state champion and TWO TIME state runner up, setting the school record for most wins in a row. But don’t let that fool ya, because the guy can kick better Martin Gramatica. Man, I wish I coulda got this guy to come kick for me at the Bucs. They should call this guy EARTHQUAKE because he does a lot more than RUMBLE.
WOO! What an exciting match-up, I tell ya if you’re not pumped up for this one then you need to get checked out. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and pick the hometown favorite Vitor Belfort because I might go to the fight and I need to make it back to the US.
Next up we have the MAIN EVENT. Wow talk about a match-up. THIS GUY (points thumb back up at himself) isn’t going to be able to sleep until this fight happens.
First off we got CHAD "MONEY" MENDES. I like this guy’s nickname, because at 11-0 you probably made some MONEY off Mendes. This guy will smother you like pork chops.
And then you have the CHAMP JOSE ALDO JR. Wow talk about a talent. I call this guy WHITE MEAT because of how much he hates legs and thighs. Aldo is ALL WORLD, man talk about a complete fighter. His leg kicks can change the race of your leg for life. WHATCH OUT because this one’s gonna be good.
I’m going for a Brazilian sweep on this one. Aldo all the way.
HT: http://www.andthevalleyshook.com/2011/12/21/2652785/a-special-guest-breaks-down-the-bcs-championship-game-jon-gruden
The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.
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I think white meat would be better for Palhares
With that said that was funny. LOL @ his kicks changing the race of your leg for life.
THIS GUY
He can blog like nobody out there! I call him FORD PINTO, because you know he’s getting recs!
Conductor of the Trainyard Sleepers! WHOO WHOOOOOO!
by Paulo Filho's Psychiatrist on Jan 12, 2012 12:01 PM EST reply actions 8 recs
I instantly started reading this in Gruden's voice
I would really like him to get back to coaching just for the fact that I wouldn’t have to hear his voice anywhere near as much
The artful muppet formerly known as KrmtDfrog.
Please read my sardonic wit and over-blown sense of self over at headkicklegend.com
by Cory Braiterman on Jan 12, 2012 12:28 PM EST reply actions
Awe man I love Gruden. He could make this year’s Colts team sound like world beaters.
If you can't wow them with brilliance, then baffle them with bullshit.
LSU! LSU! LSU! LSU! LSU! LSU!
by DayGeaux on Jan 12, 2012 1:31 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Jose Aldo used to be a FOOTBALL PLAYER
Not American FOOTBALL PLAYER, but a FOOTBALL PLAYER nonetheless. And you know what THIS GUY thinks about FOOTBALL PLAYERS.
Not afraid to nitpick
by joker24 on Jan 12, 2012 12:44 PM EST reply actions 4 recs
awesome job
"Progress lies not in enhancing what is, but in advancing toward what will be." - Kahlil Gibran
This was exactly what I was hoping it would be.
Writing things on occasion @ Head Kick Legend.
Team Captain for Ruining Your Special Night. That's what we do.
oh sweet lord not you too
THIS REAL NAME SHIT HAS TO END!
Tatum: I think he's a good man. I like him. I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children.
BECW Season 1 - The NOT LAST PLACE Team Spinning Fish
BECW Season 2 - WAR Cecil Peoples Champs
by Dave Strummer on Jan 12, 2012 10:35 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
I wish John Madden would come out of retirement just to do UFC highlights between rounds. BOOM!
When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are in a confederacy against him. - Jonathan Swift
Contributor to the USA Today/SBN Consensus MMA Rankings
Still Subo at Fightlinker.com
by Derek Suboticki on Jan 12, 2012 10:10 PM EST reply actions
ultimate commentary booth
John Madden, Jon Gruden and…. Bas Rutten
BOOM , THIS GUY, DENGA DA DANG BONG BONG…. U-F-C Boom!
Do you pick every UFC winner? Then get into Fantasy MMA! on SB Nation
Follow @benbauman3
by Ben Bauman on Jan 12, 2012 10:20 PM EST up reply actions 7 recs
The guy who wins the decision
Will usually win the fight.
by discoandherpes on Jan 13, 2012 3:37 AM EST up reply actions
This is too accurate...
Imagine if/when MMA goes even more mainstream. This is the future of MMA coverage. Folks bitch about the Goldbergs of the announcing world, we ain’t got nothing to bitch about compared to the more mainstream sports.
Just think about having Tim McCarver, Joe Buck, and Dan Dierdorf type folks doing an MMA event. Yeah, I just shit my pants too in fear.
Go Orange(men)!
Oh God
Joe Buck as a fight Announcer. Deadpan. I keep thinking he’s setting up a punchline.
Rollo
WTF!? Hahaha
Seriously, what exact search terms would one put in to find something like this?
I am scarred homie!
When you saw only one set of footprints, it was Herb Dean who carried you -- Mike Fagan
by hardlyworking on Jan 15, 2012 10:04 AM EST up reply actions
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