Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira enters the HSBC Arena at UFC 134. He defeated Brendan Schaub by first-round TKO. Photos by Al Bello/Zuffa LLC/Zuffa LLC via Getty Images
NOG STRIKES BACK
"When I feel like some guys ask me in the interviews before the fight I was the underdog, I told you I like to be the underdog." - Nogueira, starting his shift as a shoeshine boy.
"When people don't believe in me, my energy comes inside." - Nogueira
"But I believe in myself, I know I could change and I'm back." - Nogueira. And if he can change and you can change, everybody can change! We can all roll with the gays!
NOTE: THE WEEK IN QUOTES IS SATIRE. PLEASE EMAIL ALL COMPAINTS TO IDONTCARE@STILLDONTCARE.COM.
ANDERSON, WHO DO YOU WANT TO FIGHT NEXT?
"My clone." - Anderson Silva. After he defeats his clone, it's on to the two-on-one endurance matches before meeting the four-armed, half-human, half-dragon beast known as Rosie O'Donnell. (UFC 134 Telecast)
SEEING FORREST THROUGH THE TREES
"I know I had a lot of opportunities to go and I didn't go." - Forrest Griffin, on his first-round TKO loss to Mauricio Rua. Griffin's camp repeatedly instructed their fighter to use the bathroom before the right, but Griffin insisted he didn't have to go. As they made their way into the HSBC Arena, Griffin regretted his decision to hold it. (MMA Mania)
"The game plan was to kind of get off after he kind of missed, and he missed a couple times big and I just stood there and let him off the hook." - Griffin. Griffin later added, "Shogun" is who we thought he is! If you want to crown his, crown his ass! But I let 'em off the hook!
"I didn't stay in the rhythm I wanted to." - Griffin, couldn't handle his own riddum.
"I definitely could have done a lot better. It sucks when you do poorly at your job." - Griffin. Just ask Matt Roth.
THE FOX HOLE
"We don't have a main event set yet, we'll find out probably after this Saturday, these fights in Rio, then we'll set a main event. But it'll be something big. It'll be a big fight." - UFC CEO and Chairman Lorenzo Fertitta, on the UFC's debut on Fox, November 12. Fertitta's thoughts on the rumored rematch between Anderson Silva and Dan Henderson? (Tatame)
"I would love to do that. Anderson just needs a win." - Fertitta.
"It's not true." - UFC President Dana White, contradicting his business partner. (MMA Fighting)
"If he goes out and wins in 13 seconds, he's not considered for the FOX show." - White. I suppose it's a good thing he won in seven minutes, four seconds, then.
"Plus, saying that, even though I say that (Silva) won't fight on the FOX card, I'm watching what happens this weekend before I decide who's going to fight on FOX." - White
"We have to view [Fox programming] as if nobody knows anything about this sport, that people die in this cage." - UFC President Dana White, on bringing MMA to a new audience. I'm not sure the "people die in the cage" crowd is the demographic you're going to need to educate. (L.A. Times)
"If you watch an HBO boxing match, the only thing different between thirty years ago and today is HD (high definition television). Even the f***ing announcers are exactly the same! These guys are 140 years old!" - White, during a rant on Bob Arum. Larry Merchant is so old, Jack Johnson once berated him for not giving him the respect he deserves. (Opie and Anthony via MMA Mania)
"We're talking to Overeem. ... They've changed their opinions on how they can do business with us, so now we can." - White (Dan LeBatard Show)
"At the end of the day, Showtime is contracted to receive a product, and we're going to keep giving it to them." - UFC Chairman and CEO Lorenzo Fertitta. That product just may be gutted of all interesting talent. (MMA Weekly)