(Original post by The Midge)
You may not know, but there is a pandemic in America that is about to become an epidemic. I assume the difference between a pandemic and an epidemic is the "epic". Yes an epic demic. This is no ordinary pan demic (which I assume has something to do with bread).
People- be worried. Alligators have infested the borders of Minnesota. Their forces have been aligned perfectly with the imaginary lines produced by society... for now. The Dakotas are safe....for now.
I hear your frantic concerns. "But how could Gators survive the frigid landscape that is the Sota borders, my beautiful little man???" The answer is simple- robotics. Not to mention the fact that dead alligators don't need the swamp. That's right people! There's a pandemic of robotic zombie alligators out there, and they are gonna getcha! Just ask faithful GG2MMA read RachelofHearts. She fought off a congregation of these unholy beasts but a fortnight ago using nothing but a spork and her laser vision eyeballs.
Once again, I hear your frantic concerns. "Thank you so much for the warning! But what does this have to do with betting on MMA??? And is there even time to bet?" People, this has EVERYTHING to do with MMA. People often call those who collect our losses "loan sharks" but in reality this is just wordplay put on by the man. Lies and propaganda. Anyone in the in knows that robotic zombie alligators reap the benefits of our betting mistakes.
The only way to save Sota and most likely the rest of the Western Hemisphere is simple- bet. Bet bet bet like you've never bet before....wait...scratch that. Bet like you know what you are doing! Together we can bankrupt "loan sharks"and take back Sunday! (and Monday-Saturday too I suppose).
The rest of The Midge's post can be read at Gals Guide to MMA!