So you Missed Tachi Palace Fights 11? BV's got ya, baby.

So you missed the First Annual BV Talks/Tweets to Himself While Watching Tachi Palace Fights Thread?

No worries, I've got you covered. Here are 10 things to take away from the card.

DISCLAIMER: Yes, I know I already tweeted some of my observations. Deal with it. I was trying to keep my sanity.

Quick results (via Junkie):

1. Shockingly, and I do mean SHOCKINGLY, the stream quality was very good. The production was still very Public-Access, but we had no Circles of Death, no lag, and it was money both on my Firefox and Chrome browsers. I was stunned.

2. Commentary-wise, I've kind of come around on Jordan Breen. He obviously knows his stuff, and I've learned to parry away the half-dozen or so inane comments he makes to let him land a good one. C'mon, an Arn Anderson spinebuster reference as it was happening? Fantastic, even if he dresses like he's in a Killers tribute band. DeSantis is good when he can pipe in and certainly doesn't take away from the broadcast, which is what you want as a #2. Baroni...I just...I mean, he...he just....ugh. He sounds like Marty, Harry Doyle's colorman in Major League, crossed with your lightweight friend who keeps falling asleep on the bar but swears he's "not that drunk, bro". A few Baroni gems:

- (Watching a replay of the final few seconds of the round) Breen: "Phil, walk us through the last moments of that round".

Baroni: " (five seconds of dead air)....jab...missed...kick...hit...punch...there."

- "They're trying to make it a boxing match, or a kickboxing match with no punches or kicks that landed there."

- "I've gotten tired in fights before, but I wasn't outta shape, I was trying to win in the last few seconds."

- Breen: "Phil, any words for Collins on his retirement?"

Baroni: (looks into camera for three seconds) "Good job, Phil. See ya next year" (giggles to himself).

3. If you ever want to watch a motley crew of fighters, TPF is your ticket. Every white guy looks like he was plucked from a "Scared Straight" episode or auditioning for a Kid Rock biopic about his teenage years. Andrew Martinez (he of the "Mickey D" nickname) is the only welterweight with a 40-inch waist I've ever seen, Savant Young was fighting about two a half weight classes too high for him and looked like an Ashy Larry balloon animal, and Dustin Ortiz looks like he accidentally wandered into the cage after a String Cheese Incident show. The ring card girls are exactly what you'd expect. More intimidating than most of the fighters, was the head-to-toe tatted up Latina in the Chuck Taylors, Joe.

4. Most satisfying moment of the night: Brad McDonald, eighteen-year old brother of Michael McDonald, coming to the ring with his personal MC rapping a song about himself (as viewers of TPF 9 and 10 know), getting knocked cold. During the pre-fight interviews, Brad, sideways-hat and all, saying he "just wants a bloody fight man!", then putting on one of the strangest strategies I've ever seen was something to behold. He looked like everything he ever learned from hand-to-hand combat was taught to him by Liu Kang. He left-right-A-B-up'd about four flying kicks in the first minute. Finally, Francisco Rivera had about enough of this nonsense, and went head kick/hook combo and Little Mac was out before he hit the canvas. Fatality.

5. The Josh Rave-Dustin Ortiz fight was all kinds of weird. It was the saving grace of the card for the first two and a three-quarters of the fight. It was an action-packed back-and-forth battle that Ortiz took on only a week's notice. An extremely fun fight, that saw Rave fade late, but was still putting up a fight. With less than thirty seconds left, Ortiz was pouring it on, but Rave was grappling for his life, Ortiz went to go for his back and started to turn him when....the fight was stopped? What? In a geniune WTF moment of fighting, an outside official or physician called for a stop to the fight. 23 seconds left in the round and Rave not having spilled a drop of blood or in any danger outside of being tired. Ortiz technically got the TKO and I had him winning on my card, but that was just so strange. When asked by Breen if Baroni had ever seen anything like that, Phil managed to get out what appeared to be "Hmphr, I haven't seen...".

6. For those wondering about Bubba Jenkins, he was solid. He was also facing Josh Williams, who was making his debut, as well. When Bubba immediately launched a huge slam on Williams, Josh latched on a DEEP guillotine. As was mentioned in the thread, I'd like to see someone with at least one professional MMA fight throw that guillotine on Jenkins. Eventually, though, he did get out of it, and fought his way to a "lay-and-slay" (his words) victory, via the weakest tap to strikes I've ever seen.

7. The two title fights at the top of the card redeemed TPF 11 like I had hoped they would. Georgi is a longtime vet and good to see him pick up a title win, and "Useless" is now a two-division champion in Tachi. If the UFC won't take them, I'd love to see them both back in Bellator.

8. I didn't think it was possible, but Anthony Figueroa and Paul Ruiz put on the first-ever plodding Flyweight fight I've ever seen. It can be done!

9. I do feel for TPF having to scratch Ian McCall at the last minute, as it would have really turned the card into something big, but it was pretty damned fun still seeing him. The guy's nickname is "Uncle Creepy" and he looks like Snidely Whiplash, how can you not love that guy?

10. I will say that the broadcast-opening tribal dance that Tachi puts on is pretty cool. It's unique to TPF, and that's always a good thing.


- Thanks for everyone who hung out in the thread, especially Forkboy, Rabbit, Tittles (my name for him because I don't feel like writing out (. Y .) ), Mazz, Joben, Buttbarbandit, Rufford and everyone else. Good times.

\The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.

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