What If I Told You?
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What if i told you...
That Anderson Silva was alright...but he's no Michael Bisping?
...That 8/12=80%?
...That 2 MMA legends would stage the greatest fight ever-which Farthammer would miss for a babysitting gig?
What if I told you that J.O.E. would beat Shane Carwin, and that 99% of BE posters think Arianny Celeste and Gina Carano are only 1% hot?
...That SC Michaelson was abducted by aliens midsummer, or that a respected BE staffer could be made to disappear for making fun of a sensitive-ass reporter in a fancy suit?
What if I told you that part 1 of a brilliant 'Tournament of Bad' Fanpost, about MMA's greatest 'Knocked-out' artists, would be written, only to have part 2 delayed longer than 'Chinese Democracy?'
...That Melvin Guillard and Jon Jones could never, ever, under any circumstances, be faded?
What if I told you 'LET'S MUTHERFUKERS!!!?'
What if I told you that a wonderful years' worth of an amazing website could change the way you think about MMA?
Happy Holidays everyone. It's been a blast. Thanks for all of your time, energy, thoughts, and bullshit this year. Have a fun and safe holiday season and remember-if Frank Mir has hold of one of your appendages, JUST FUCKING TAP ALREADY!!!
The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.
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Happy Holidays to you too.
I can’t have a safe holiday (fun/awesome/challenging… yeah sure) … because my instructor is up from Brazil for one week starting today (he’s one of the hand to hand combat trainers for the BOPE in Rio) and his facebook status reads:
Tonight will bring hell to the mat
Only the strong survive
Prepare your souls . . .
Can’t wait. :)
But yes, happy holidays to all ya’ll BE folks.
-AboveThisFire
The mat is my church, the ground is my heaven, Jiu-Jitsu is my religion. And once you hit the ground you're in my world. My world is like the ocean, I’m like a shark and most people don't even know how to swim - Draculino
If I live in a castle and you want to kill me, storming the gates is probably not the best idea. You'd do a lot better hitting me in the head with a brick when I come out for the mail. -Ryan Hall
I then rip off my shirt and do like a hulk scream and pose and then say to the kid " don’t you no I would fucking destroy you are you fucking retarded? -Areyouforreal
The spirit of giving for him means something entirely different.
It's just a world, it's just a life.
Christmas in Brazil must be like Christmas on Futurama :(
-AboveThisFire
The mat is my church, the ground is my heaven, Jiu-Jitsu is my religion. And once you hit the ground you're in my world. My world is like the ocean, I’m like a shark and most people don't even know how to swim - Draculino
If I live in a castle and you want to kill me, storming the gates is probably not the best idea. You'd do a lot better hitting me in the head with a brick when I come out for the mail. -Ryan Hall
I then rip off my shirt and do like a hulk scream and pose and then say to the kid " don’t you no I would fucking destroy you are you fucking retarded? -Areyouforreal
by Patrick Tenney on Dec 19, 2011 2:05 PM EST up reply actions 4 recs
The quote of the day.
"All noble things are as difficult as they are rare."
- Baruch Spinoza
The most classless fan in college football since 1984.
All Lyoto wants for Christmas are your two front teeth
Your two front teeth, yeah your two front teeth!
Happy Holidays to everyone
Unless you’re a Jehovah’s Witness, then it’s “Hi. Have a nice day.”
"Now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb."
by menckenstein on Dec 19, 2011 2:06 PM EST reply actions 6 recs
Happy Holidays to everyone!!!! And
Please tell me what about that member who was dropped out who made fun of a journalist? I seem to guess who is the suit wearing journalist. Please tell me what happenned??? I m curious!!!! :)
And great fun article i loved reading it ..but i m no Michael Bisping LOL I m happy I was there when this whole was given birth :D
we'd tell you
but then wed be banned. or killed.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
I know who and what youre referencing
And that’s not what happened
Business as Usual has a STACKED team. I mean, we could win with just me, but you know.
by halitosis on Dec 19, 2011 3:41 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Mike Fagan is the guy who got banned or rebanned or something
because he made fun of Ariel Helwani. It was tots drama (is that how you use that? I’m old and don’t really know)
"Serious sport is war minus the shooting."
George Orwell
Yes i guessed its about that guy but what happenned?
I mean what did he write and how did this whole thing come out? I thought its a free world anyone can write critiques no? I dislike Helwani thats my personal opinion so what? Its just high for me and thank you really i will be glad for more explanation because i keep hearing stuff but i d like to know …
i really dont think it was that big of a deal.
said he killed a few hookers in the 90’s or something. and my advice would be to start liking helwani…or else.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 4:02 PM EST up reply actions 5 recs
LOLLLL
i just read the connecting post in which everyone was happy that Yan117 was let back finally after a slight misunderstanding :)
IMO this case was made up, the guy (Mike) didnt seem to have said nothing really… so noone understands but it is what it is :)
An epic
twitter beef erupted during a press conference and BE got rid of Fagan. There is a right up here: here
"Serious sport is war minus the shooting."
George Orwell
YUPPP I just finished reading the comments
I didnt get clevered but i saw that guy named Yan was fired a couple of times ( is he here) and that everyone disliked a guy who was called Chogorunga(or something like this) it was fun to read!!!!!
I'm fairly sure it has nothing to do with that beef
What it actually does have to do with, I’m not exactly sure, but time and time again the writers and everyone else says that it isn’t Helwani.
Business as Usual has a STACKED team. I mean, we could win with just me, but you know.
Kid Nate responded to this a while back.
Basically said Fagan just wasn’t doing what was expected of an Editor. Nothing to do with Helwani. But of course, we can always speculate.
"All noble things are as difficult as they are rare."
- Baruch Spinoza
The most classless fan in college football since 1984.
Wait...how did you get my picture...
they’reinthetrees
"Hi. I don't know you." - me
"Cigano punch my face...all the time." - Anderson Silva
of course they do.
helwanis illuminati.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 9:50 PM EST up reply actions
just know he cant be faded.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
hmmmmm
when i joined the community i was so lucky to have witnessed the fading of one notorious member… but maybe he is here and watching us all :D
Nice post.
Pretty good year for both MMA and Bloody Elbow.
Thanks to everyone on here for making it so memorable.
All these, uh, dealmakers making deals. Ya know, I don't, all I know is I'm ready to fight so, ya know, I'm sorry I didn't make it to the beauty pageant.
thanks.
not quite sure how it degenerated into the mike fagan memorial, but craziness is part of what i love about BE.
but on the real, DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO PART 2 OF THE B.E. TOURNAMENT OF BAD (KNOCKED OUT ARTISTS?) im slightly obsessed, and a little scared i missed it somehow.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 5:03 PM EST up reply actions
My guess
is Plantingafan discovered that other minds don’t exist and then vanished.
"All noble things are as difficult as they are rare."
- Baruch Spinoza
The most classless fan in college football since 1984.
by Avap on Dec 19, 2011 5:05 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
hes in a spider hole with s.c.
come out mutherfuckers, we need the new testament!!!
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 5:06 PM EST up reply actions
HAPPY HOLIDAYS
Business as Usual has a STACKED team. I mean, we could win with just me, but you know.
i love you farthammer,
we all do. but goddamn, have we gotten some mileage out of this. please can we just get a little more?
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 5:04 PM EST up reply actions
couldn't you have seen in in person
if you weren’t babysitting?
¬_¬
by ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ on Dec 20, 2011 12:25 AM EST up reply actions 2 recs
This post
Made me laugh, as it covered my first year of visiting this site with any frequency very very well. Happy Holidays to all!
Robbie Lawler vs Nick Diaz UFC 47
Rogan: (after Diaz throws a looping left kick) Look at this Karate Kid stuff right here
Goldie: Daniel Miyagi has arrived in the OCTAGON.
by HeadKickOfDoom on Dec 19, 2011 5:04 PM EST reply actions 2 recs
Happy Holidays
Hopefully you get a visit from
"You couldn't tell the difference between the porn I watch and a Mike Tyson highlight reel" - Luke Thomas
by IRodC on Dec 19, 2011 5:26 PM EST reply actions 3 recs
is that christian bale?
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 5:37 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
kenflo?
"Here we are with Seraldo Babalu, you did an awesome job, saw why you’re a black belt in jiu-jitsu, getting an awesome submission there, I want to tell me what you see, let’s go ahead and see by the fight, what you saw, in the ring." - Tito (the Head) Ortiz - Great Commentator, or Greatest Commentator.
"GSP is me."
by El Pablo Diablo on Dec 19, 2011 8:20 PM EST up reply actions 3 recs
Even more impressive that it’s a 3 legged horse.
Your beliefs become your reality.
by Hardy's in your face on Dec 19, 2011 8:26 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
hey!
who are you really, and who told you what my college nickname was???
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 9:22 PM EST up reply actions 4 recs
Too bad that kickstand only rises for GSP anymore...
Learn JiuJitsu.
Semper Fi'
Look out! Marshawn Lynch is in BEEF MOE! "gimmie dem skittles! Om nom nom!"
by RolloTomasi on Dec 20, 2011 3:11 PM EST up reply actions 3 recs
18k
The Season 4 BE rec’ing CHAMPION!
The Season 1 Blow the Staff CHAMPION!
The Season 2, 3 and 4 Cat Molesting CHAMPION!
The reigning and defending Transgendered S&M CHAMPION!
And the soon to be Ugly-Ass Ben Saunders Shirt Buying CHAMPION!
Follow me on Twitter @Chris81203
on rogers. against overeem
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 20, 2011 5:51 AM EST up reply actions
hahahahahahahahahaaha
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha……hahahah…….haha…………ha.
yes
"Here we are with Seraldo Babalu, you did an awesome job, saw why you’re a black belt in jiu-jitsu, getting an awesome submission there, I want to tell me what you see, let’s go ahead and see by the fight, what you saw, in the ring." - Tito (the Head) Ortiz - Great Commentator, or Greatest Commentator.
"GSP is me."
by El Pablo Diablo on Dec 20, 2011 8:50 PM EST up reply actions
Merry Christmas friends.
KEMvP
"You know Joe, if Keith Jardines last name was Johnson, the nickname 'The Dean of Mean' wouldn't work at all."
by T.C. Engel on Dec 19, 2011 5:47 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
I am amazed that the Civil War didn’t tear us completely apart. I had a good time this year, Bloody Elbowners.
"If you say the words "Clint Eastwood" and western in a sentence, my pants are magically around my ankles." - mountaineers101
mdh-
bisping-esque are your commenting skills. if there was a blackbelt in smartassness, youd have 4. ive enjoyed your work, sir. thank you.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 9:25 PM EST up reply actions
thanks man! UP TOP!
"If you say the words "Clint Eastwood" and western in a sentence, my pants are magically around my ankles." - mountaineers101
by Earl Montclair on Dec 19, 2011 9:32 PM EST up reply actions 6 recs
Cheers to you, sir
The Season 4 BE rec’ing CHAMPION!
The Season 1 Blow the Staff CHAMPION!
The Season 2, 3 and 4 Cat Molesting CHAMPION!
The reigning and defending Transgendered S&M CHAMPION!
And the soon to be Ugly-Ass Ben Saunders Shirt Buying CHAMPION!
Follow me on Twitter @Chris81203
by Chris Hall on Dec 19, 2011 11:03 PM EST up reply actions 6 recs
whoa
"If you say the words "Clint Eastwood" and western in a sentence, my pants are magically around my ankles." - mountaineers101
by Earl Montclair on Dec 19, 2011 11:58 PM EST up reply actions
(S)he's got it backwards, it's the other person who's supposed to get drunk to improve his/her looks.
"Now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb."
by menckenstein on Dec 20, 2011 12:00 PM EST up reply actions
Not in Japan...
Learn JiuJitsu.
Semper Fi'
Look out! Marshawn Lynch is in BEEF MOE! "gimmie dem skittles! Om nom nom!"
Crazy Japan
They’re so backwards… must be that southern hemisphere thing… kangaroos… polar bears… poutine…
"Now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb."
by menckenstein on Dec 20, 2011 3:29 PM EST up reply actions
Easy tiger...
Cant forget our Grizzly Black Bears
Don't be scared Gomi...
by ThatsHowIRoll on Dec 20, 2011 8:55 PM EST up reply actions
Heard those were a real menace in Lankfordshireton
"Pain or damage don't end the world. Or despair or fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man... and give some back." -Swearengen
by AwkwardwithwordmakingisGoldberg,huhJoe on Dec 20, 2011 9:56 PM EST up reply actions
Northen England
Not Japan. You obviously have no intellegence
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 20, 2011 11:05 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
I'm referring to those found in the outback that mauled Elvis Sinosic's face...
But you’re right, I’m no Michael Bisping
Don't be scared Gomi...
by ThatsHowIRoll on Dec 21, 2011 5:11 PM EST up reply actions
God bless us, every one
also, I always read your screen name as GSP Game Day for some reason.
Tatum: I think he's a good man. I like him. I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children.
no, its gsp.made.me.GAY.
and i get name-gaybashed constantly.
guess i coulda picked a better name.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 9:27 PM EST up reply actions
i think it is an awesome name
"If you say the words "Clint Eastwood" and western in a sentence, my pants are magically around my ankles." - mountaineers101
by Earl Montclair on Dec 19, 2011 9:28 PM EST up reply actions
but youre a smartass.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
I'm surprised this hasn't been posted yet.
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." - Wayne Gretzky - Michael Scott
by Sugel Mendoza on Dec 19, 2011 10:16 PM EST reply actions 5 recs
i am not going to tell my children the story of santa claus
I will tell them about Wandy Claus
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 19, 2011 10:45 PM EST up reply actions
it has. by me (see fanshots)
still happy to see it tho.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 19, 2011 11:53 PM EST up reply actions
What if i told you that the combination of this fanpost's title and your screename made for a hilarious sentence?
*providing you add “that” in between
by darkotto23 on Dec 20, 2011 12:11 AM EST reply actions 4 recs
Get's me every single time I read it
The Season 4 BE rec’ing CHAMPION!
The Season 1 Blow the Staff CHAMPION!
The Season 2, 3 and 4 Cat Molesting CHAMPION!
The reigning and defending Transgendered S&M CHAMPION!
And the soon to be Ugly-Ass Ben Saunders Shirt Buying CHAMPION!
Follow me on Twitter @Chris81203
Happy holidays gentlemen
It’s been awesome getting started participating in the community here.
"Denique nullumst iam dictum quod non dictum sit prius."-- Terence
"By doubting we come to inquiry and by inquiry we perceive the truth." -- Abelard
Ketchup is disgusting and garbage.
Right leg swelling, Left leg minor bruising
by Well Read Idiot on Dec 20, 2011 5:36 AM EST reply actions 4 recs
Natural wrestling abilities
and dynamite in both hands
"The fact that society may find speech offensive is not a sufficient reason for suppressing it. Indeed, if it is the speaker's opinion that gives offense, that consequence is a reason for according it constitutional protection."
With the power to break faces
fuck you you little bitch do you no who I am
Learn JiuJitsu.
Semper Fi'
Look out! Marshawn Lynch is in BEEF MOE! "gimmie dem skittles! Om nom nom!"
then I tear off my shirt and do like a hulk pose
and scream
"Here we are with Seraldo Babalu, you did an awesome job, saw why you’re a black belt in jiu-jitsu, getting an awesome submission there, I want to tell me what you see, let’s go ahead and see by the fight, what you saw, in the ring." - Tito (the Head) Ortiz - Great Commentator, or Greatest Commentator.
"GSP is me."
by El Pablo Diablo on Dec 20, 2011 9:06 PM EST up reply actions
also
We can officially call Ben Saunders a member of the BE community.
And OBP’s response to IKilled007’s poem/rap about Jon Jones. That was awesome on a different level.
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 20, 2011 5:54 AM EST reply actions 5 recs
Been a BE lurker
For at least two years. This year I finally made the jump to poster and not (yet) regretting it. But seriously, WHERE’S THE TOURNEY OF BAD!!? I predict the alternate future where “Jon Jones is the P4P best fighter of all time” makes it all the way!
by GreyedOut on Dec 20, 2011 6:17 AM EST via mobile reply actions
paging plantingafan.
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 20, 2011 8:16 AM EST up reply actions
This
Needs more Tournament of Bad.
KEMvP
"You know Joe, if Keith Jardines last name was Johnson, the nickname 'The Dean of Mean' wouldn't work at all."
…That 2 MMA legends would stage the greatest fight ever-which Farthammer would miss for a babysitting gig?
Wouldn’t that be crazy?
Learn JiuJitsu.
Semper Fi'
Look out! Marshawn Lynch is in BEEF MOE! "gimmie dem skittles! Om nom nom!"
youre late to the party!
but at least you made it-unlike farthammer @shogun/hendo
i tried to change my username to 'big country fit' but the system wouldnt let me.
by gspmademegay on Dec 20, 2011 3:20 PM EST up reply actions
Merry Christmas, Carwin.
Now, stay down.
It's that the world is basically a forced labor camp from which the workers, perfectly innocent, are led forth by lottery, a few each day, to be executed.
I don't think that's just the way I see it. I think that's the way it is. Are there alternative views? Yes. Will any of them stand close scrutiny? No.
What if i told you GSP IS ME!
"Pain or damage don't end the world. Or despair or fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man... and give some back." -Swearengen
by AwkwardwithwordmakingisGoldberg,huhJoe on Dec 20, 2011 8:47 PM EST reply actions
SC Michaelson...Whatever happend to that guy
between him and Urijah Beiber…
What other posters made it “big” by being hated/loved by the masses?
K-1 Level Predictions Team
I believe UB got banned.....again...
The Season 4 BE rec’ing CHAMPION!
The Season 1 Blow the Staff CHAMPION!
The Season 2, 3 and 4 Cat Molesting CHAMPION!
The reigning and defending Transgendered S&M CHAMPION!
And the soon to be Ugly-Ass Ben Saunders Shirt Buying CHAMPION!
Follow me on Twitter @Chris81203
Well
I know all of Bloody Elbow loves me
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 20, 2011 11:06 PM EST up reply actions
If you're trying to summon him,
try saying Melving Guillard’s name three times.
"Hi. I don't know you." - me
"Cigano punch my face...all the time." - Anderson Silva
Melvin Guillard Melvin Guillard Melvin Guillard
I enjoy MMA, but I am no Michael Bisping
by Andy Anderson on Dec 21, 2011 2:55 PM EST up reply actions
Kimbo Slice Kimbo Slice Kimbo Slice
You know, cuz they always tryna fade Kimbo but he’s gettin his. Or whatever.
by El_Ee_Oh on Dec 21, 2011 3:23 PM EST via Android app up reply actions
Just by the general sense of disinterest in that post, you''re now officially tryin to fade Kimbo.
"Hi. I don't know you." - me
"Cigano punch my face...all the time." - Anderson Silva
So glad to be a part of BE.
I was a long time lurker and stumbled upon this site a few years ago. Just joined and started posting this year. Never read another SBNation mma blog (before tonight, I checked out Mania earlier…never again) and joined on a whim. Some of the stuff in the comments and the tangents they go out on…purely awesome.
That being said, Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/ Hannakah/ Boxing Day / Harvest Day/ Small Animal Sacrifice Season/ whatever you celebrate. Looking forward to more years of insanity, assuming the world doesn’t end next year.
by El_Ee_Oh on Dec 21, 2011 12:54 AM EST via Android app reply actions
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