Yeah, you read that right. I hate Jon Jones. Why? I wrote a poem about it:
Dear Jon, I wrote you but still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in Autumn, you must not-a got 'em
There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin'
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's your daughter?
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'm a call her?
I'm a name her Leah
I read about your brother Author too I'm sorry
I had a friend play for the Ravens, too, who'd want them
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with KOTC Klan
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with UFC too, that shit was fat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Mike
Dear Jon, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance
I ain't mad, I just think it's fucked up you don't answer fans
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your fight
You didn't have to, but you coulda signed an autograph for Richard
That's my little brother man, he's only thirty-six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
For four hours and you just said, "No."
That's pretty shitty man, you're like his fuckin' idol
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like bein' lied to
Remember when we met in Denver, you said if I'd write you
You would write back, see I'm just like you in a way
I never knew my coach neither,
He used to always cheat on the points and get eager
I can relate to what you're saying in your blogs
So when I have a shitty day, I drift away and put 'em on
Cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
It's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
My girlfriend's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don't know you like I know you Jon, no one does
She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Mike, P.S.
We should be together too
Dear Mister "I'm Too Good To Call Or Write My Fans",
This will be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word, I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Jon, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
About that guy who could a saved that other guy from drowning
But didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you could a rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late, I'm on a thousand downers now, I'm drowsy
And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped all of your pictures off the wall
I love you Jon, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it
I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't breathe without me
What do you guys think?