The Week in Quotes: August 22nd - 28th

HEY PRINCESS, I'M GONNA GETCHYA

"James Toney is God's gift to MMA right now." - B.J. Penn, former God's gift to MMA. (MMA Fighting)

"I have a wrestling background. I'm going to go out and try to close the distance and put him on his back; take him out of that boxing realm." - Randy Couture, with a genius gameplan. (Bloody Elbow)

"I can knock out from my back. I do have that kind of power." - James Toney, through a translator. (MMA Heat)

"He's gotten in the best shape he's been in in years and this is going to be a very interesting fight." - UFC President Dana White, with an interesting take on "best shape." Toney, who won his first boxing title at middlewight, weighed in at his peak weight of 237 pounds. (Sports Radio Interviews)

"I seen fear. I smelled it, too." - Toney, on Couture or projecting? (MMA Junkie)

"Anything can happen when two good guys go in there and start throwing punches, scrapping, and fighting." - White, forgetting to mention that Couture had no intention of simply going in and throwing punches.

"I can knock him out, or I can choke him out – either, or." - Toney

"I had no illusions of trying to stand up with Toney. I pulled off the low single leg because it is really hard to counter that with a punch." - Couture, and that's all she wrote. (MMA Torch)

"It's unfair to bring a guy in with one discipline, no matter if he's trained for eight or nine months." - White, knew this and went ahead anyway. (MMA Junkie)

"I am not going to accept the contract to box Toney in a boxing ring because that would just as silly as him coming to fight me here. He would probably beat me in the first round just like I beat him." - Couture

CHOKING VICTIM

"I think Kenny is just one of those guys who chokes in big fights." - UFC President Dana White, on Kenny Florian, who lost a fairly one-side decision to Gray Maynard at UFC 118. (MMA Fighting)

"He stood there and stared at Gray Maynard for three rounds." - White

"You'd think his corner would say, 'Dude, you just lost the first two rounds.' No sense of urgency in the third round.'Not saying, 'I need a knockout or submission in this round.' None of it. Nothing." - White, speaking to a lot of fighters down 2-0 in the third round.

"He's here in his hometown, another shot at the title and he sits in front of Gray Maynard for three rounds. He couldn't let anything go. Gray Maynard fought his fight, did what he wanted to do, and dominated him tonight." - White, who may have stumbled onto the source of Florian's problem: more talented fighters.

THE BIG ARISTOTLE

"Listen, I love Herb Dean but I'll be watching on TV and I'll be like 'Herb, why do you stop the fight so soon all the time?' Five more punches to the head please." - Shaquille O'Neal (UFC.com)

"I'd like to fight one guy. I'd like to call out, they say pick on someone your own size. That guy would be Hong Man Choi out of Korea. Seven footer fighting seven footer." - O'Neal. It's just too bad Dream is about to die a slow, painful death. (ESPN)

EL DEVORADOR DE CABALLO

"'Maybe Alistair needs extra drug testing; Maybe Alistair needs to fight other opponents first, and [then] maybe, he deserves to fight Fedor.' So these guys, they declined to fight me." - Alistair Overeem, detailing M-1 Global's latest ploy regarding Fedor Emelianenko. (MMA Junkie)

"Now, all of a sudden, they've dropped their terms. Now, they do want to fight me. It's all tricks, and I don't feel pressured by it at all." - Overeem, who's been rumored to fight Fedor's brother, Aleksander Emelianenko, and/or enter the K-1 Grand Prix tournament.

"M-1 shows in Russia don't do any drug testing on...any of their fighters. So why do they want that for me when they're not doing it on their own fighters?" - Overeem

"If they're going to implement it for all MMA fighters, then I'll be happy to submit myself. I'm going to do what everybody does because I'm not any different." - Overeem, on Olympic-style drug testing.

WHITE NOISE

"I don't know how he got into football but he likes it. But I'm terrified for this kid to play football." - UFC President Dana White, on his oldest son. (Cage Writer)

"I don’t know enough about it to go into it in depth." - White, on Shane Carwin's name appearing on a list of athletes who received steroids from an Alabama pharmacist. Apparently White, who claims fighters are subjected to stricter drug testing procedures than other athletes, cares so much about the issue of PEDs that he hasn't done research on the issue of his last heavyweight title challenger showing up on a very compromising list. (MMA Fighting)

"But, I know he came up on like a BALCO-type list. On a list of guys who did it. But, this guy’s fought in the UFC a long time, under regulation and has never tested positive for anything. We’ll see how this whole thing plays out." - White, so serious about eradicating PED use from the UFC that he told Josh Koscheck to shut up about more stringent drug testing.

PARTING SHOTS

"A motivated B.J. Penn is somebody not to mess with, and you know what? I'm pretty motivated." - B.J. Penn, who looked flat-footed and disinterested at UFC 118 from the moment he stepped into the cage. (Heavy.com)

"I'm honestly going out there with the expectation to out-wrestle Gray." - Kenny Florian, choked on that too. (MMA Mania)

"It wasn't like I caught B.J. with a punch or a submission or anything like that. Who knows? Maybe [beating B.J.] was a fluke, but I don't think it was." - Frankie Edgar (5th Round)

"Forrest, Forrest, Forrest! Do I get sick of hearing Forrest Griffin's name? Yeah, real sick of hearing Forrest Griffin's name. You know, it's great being known for a great fight, but God, I get called Forrest so many times, you know?" - Stephan Bonnar, who should be thanking Forrest Griffin every morning he wakes up. (HDNet Fights)

"During the fight I remember thinking, ‘Man, really? All the hype was about this guy?’ I specifically remember saying to him in my head, ‘Man, you (expletive) suck.’" - Brandon Vera, on the man who broke his face, Jon Jones. (Las Vegas Sun)