How's Taste My Tweet Tweet? Mixed Martial Arts on Twitter for the 4th Week of August

A few updates on what's been going on in the MMA Twittersphere.

LET'S PLAY MATCHMAKER: WHO WOULD YOU PUT HIM UP AGAINST?

"Fedor has categorically stated who he wants to fight next. It's a fight that should please everyone... It is just 1 specific fighter. Best location is probably in the US, in December."  -Evgeni Kogan, of M-1 Global... Megareem or bust!

"I will be back training in 4 months. Good challenge 4 me . Thanks dr Moises Cohen and thanks u guys for all messages."  -Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira, had surgery in Brazil. He'll probably face the winner of Crocop vs Mir, but I personally would want the winner of that fight against Tim Sylvia.

"This year I am not going to fight for the title because the champion is hurt but November we will be in action for sure that is what I can"  -Vitor Belfort, I'm glad that Anderson is probably going to rematch Chael Sonnen, and I'm hoping Vitor takes on Okami for the next title shot.

"Omigawa just tweeted that he wants to fight Bibiano. Do it DREAM!"  -Daniel Herbertson, well it would be nice if they paid him first.

"Home for almost a week. My lip is heeling fine and I'll start to train again next week! No injuries so I hope to be back in the octagon soon"  -Stefan Struve, should train (and eat) with Alistair Overeem and the guys from Golden Glory, and he'll be a scary scary beast.

KEEPING IT CLASSY

"@Georgesstpierre Hi Frenchy, I am sure ur missing me??? Hope u are working on that stand up?? :) see you in DEC! Xoxo ur daddy KOS"  -Josh Koscheck, is pretty sweet for sending his opponent hugs and kisses.

"@KingMO_GDP that's what u get 4 talking shit,u nipple ring wearing bitch,now keep my name out Yo mouth,before I crash u lil boy"  -Rampage Jackson

"4 everybody that is running there cock sucker right now mo talked shit about me after my last fight,so im talking shit about him,sogetalife"  -Rampage Jackson

"@Rampage4real U got a short memory huh bruh. Catch ur head my nigga. Real talk u been on the other side many times. With more to come."  -Daniel Cormier

"family first. I'm well aware of what he did and who he is. But right now he's being very classless... ur brother is down and someone kicks him what do u do? If nothing ur not a good person. Always fight for ur family."  -Daniel Cormier

"Hey. I lost, but Ima be back. love my people that stood by me."  -King Mo, yeah, well F*** the Fans! ANGRY NOISES!

DANA WHITE, ON STRIKEFORCE & BARACK OBAMA

"its karma coming back on shittime sports"  -Dana White, tweeted this shortly after Strikeforce: Houston ended.

"you have to see them for what they are a minor league show. We need them around but showtime really does suck! Horrible production"  -Dana White, replying to a fan who was asking him to "Destroy" Strikeforce.

"I'm pissed at @BarackObama! He never gives his UFC fight predictions. @HarryReid always gives his and is 1-1"  -Dana White

AND YOU THOUGHT FIGHTING ON THE UFC WOULD MAKE YOU POPULAR

"Movie ticket guy hears us talking about 118 and ask if we are coming in for it. I say I'm fighting on it and he goes "yea sure..." doh!"  -Joe Lauzon, got mistaken for one of those Affliction wearing "Yeah I train UFC" posers?

"In the airport headed to japan for the troops. A fan asked me to take a pic of him & dustin hazelett, & walkd away."  -Rich Franklin, the former UFC champ isn't as popular as McLovin?

"Awesome...i had a fan ask me and dustin for a pic thnkn we were jon fitch & forrest."  -Rich Franklin, I walked up to Jim Carrey thinking I was about to get a pic with Franklin. He had this weird look in his face when I walked away disappointed. true story.

"Got beat n 2on2 against Joe and Dustin. my teammate was the assist king. he had 2 or 3 assists to Joe & maybe 4 to dustin :)"  -Rich Franklin, blames his teammate for losing a basketball game against Joe Stevenson and Dustin Hazelett... He should've just blamed the broken arm.

Note: Rich also blogs about his experiences in Japan with Joe Stevenson and Dustin Hazelett. Check it out here and here.

BOOBIES!!!!!!11!!1!!one!

"quote of the day: We are 4 tits away from being happy around here! Thx HZ"  -Josh Koscheck, started a "party" with only 2 dudes in the room?

"Charity ride for the cure. We r goingbto Dave the boobies... Save the boobies I ment. Lol damm t9"  -Tim Sylvia, I wonder how's taste their tweet tweet?

"I want to meet a girl the old fashioned way, and by that, I mean myspace."  -Mayhem Miller

"What's more awkward?.. Walking in on someone going poop or walking in on someone masturbating??"  -Natasha Wicks, why would the former be awkward?

"#Why is it when a man talks dirty to a woman, its sexual harassment, but when a woman talks dirty to a man it's $3.95 a min?"  -Miguel Torres

WOULD YOU RATHER SEE KOSCHECK WITHOUT PANTS, WEARING LIPSTICK, OR KICKED IN THE NUTSACK?

"I got kicked sq N the BALLS! Now every day,it becomes easier 2get out of bed &walk N the right direction. It's a mind set people! Do it! GN... Oh ya I took the ice off my balls & sucked it up.Walking TALL:) I always find away 2 get what I want somehow! So can u HARD Work- pays off"  -Josh Koscheck

"7 & 8 year old girls got me when I was napping today! Ahahahaha thx presley & paris."  -Josh Koscheck

"Dam kos?????? LolRT: @dethrone Then it all went wrong."  -Josh Koscheck, very wrong

WANT TO KEEP YOU KID IN LINE? INTRODUCE THEM TO GRANDMA BANDIT

"So this cat on intervention lives with his grandma and shoots heroin in the living room while she's there. She does nothing... Do u know the kind of physical damage that would be done to me if I shot heroin in front of my grandma!? I don't even walk n her house w/shoes on... Seriously tho.Grandma would fuck me up...Mom too.I'd b laid out,eventually they'd call 911 but not till they were sure I'd learned my lesson"  -Jason High

"Allow me to share a touching little anecdote my grandma shared with me once. This will be a long tweet, just so u know. When I was around 14 I got caught stealing in The Jones Store at Independence Center, a mall not far from my house. That Christmas my Grandma sat me down at the kitchen table and had a talk with me...went something like this.
"So ya got caught stealing huh?"
"Yea"
"You know what happens to adult criminal, don't you?"
"no"
"They go to the penitentiary. And them niggas up in there don't play. They take little niggas like yourself, and f*ck 'em in the ass, make you suck they d*cks. Them niggas do not play. So keep on stealing shit, see where you end up"

Grandma don't f*ck around."  -Jason High

DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY... YOU DON'T LIKE ME WHEN I'M ANGRY

"@m3mma can you remove @warriorint from my twitter and website. They do not value me so they must go."  -Shane Carwin

"I have been playing a lot of Golf. I think I could love that game and I am a little less scandalous than Tiger Woods..."  -Shane Carwin, Well in my humble opinion, Tiger showing off his 'playa' skills isn't scandalous, (allegedly) cheating on the other hand...

AS THAT COMMENTATOR SAYS, "GRACIE JOOOO...JIT..SOOOOO"

"For sale: bjj black belt. Never used, in pristine condition. Contact: j. Gurgel"  -Matthew Benyon, who you may also know as Martial Farts

"Just won the ultra heavy weight, at the No-Gi Nationals."  -Rolles Gracie

"@GregorGracie cleaned the house on the open weight, 3 brothers 3 gold medals. Medium heavy, ultra heavy and open. @igorgracie"  -Rolles Gracie

TWICTURES

"New truck"  -Tim Sylvia, seems to be doing just fine financially.

"Not to bad for a ten min fight last night."  -Tim Sylvia, I would like to see him back in the UFC. He did make the call and wanted to replace Nog when he pulled out of the fight against Mir, but the UFC decided they wanted Crocop instead... Maybe he'd get another chance after he wins his next bout.

"Look who came 2 dinner tonight with me & low daddy n fresno! Evander holyfield"  -Josh Koscheck

"Who changed the tire faster again??? @Rampage4real ;) Mmmhmmmm"  -Rachelle Leah, Rampage doesn't change tires... well, unless he drank too much energy drinks, then he won't have a choice.

"Had a good day today ,went to the farm. Meet my family, took fight to SP ,talk to my doctor ."  -Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira

TWIDEOS

"Off to Boston!!!"  -Dana White, says he's going to gain around 15 pounds in 2 days.

not a tweet, but here's a quick video from Rampage where he does a prank on some fans:

"I uploaded a YouTube video -- Belfort"  -Vitor Belfort, twitter has a 140 character limit, and I guess these guys have a 30 second video cap.

"RT @BJ_For_Real: Who punches harder @migueltorresmma or @firas_zahabi"  -Miguel Torres, Criss Angel would own both of these guys though.

#BringLoganAndNatashaBack

"My Red Rock Running buddy!"  -Natasha Wicks

"Wow ur phone is hot! Haha :) RT @njustiz4all:Guess what came in today. All my budz will envy. Love it. Thanks"  -Arianny Celeste

"Celebration b%*£es!"  -Rachelle Leah, on her birthday party.

" I need a coffee can I go to starbucks looking like this??!?"  -Arianny Celeste

" That's a wrap! Amazing..can't wait to share these photos!!"  -Arianny Celeste

"Look at my beautiful friend! Brooke is my girl from @purelv"  -Brittney Palmer

"Interview time!! Rockin the new G shock!"  -Brittney Palmer

Also, If you have a twitter account, don't forget to follow:

The Official BloodyElbow Twitter Account, Luke Thomas, Kid Nate, Brent Brookhouse, Mike Fagan, Chris Nelson, Leland Roling, Richard Wade, some guy named Anton Tabuena, and Jonathan Snowden.