Junior Dos Santos and Ed Soares vs. The UFC: The Comic
by Nick Thomas on Feb 9, 2010 1:16 PM EST
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PrintFrom Poopyface TomatoNose on the UG:
Junior Dos Santos Vs. The UFC: The Comic VOLUME 1: 
"Dana, I beat #1 contender, can I has a shitle tot?"
"Not so fast, kid! We need to put you against this random unranked prospect with a dangerous submission game to see if you're the real deal!"
"Ok. I do, Dana. Shitle tot?"
"Sorry kid. I haven't seen what you can do against a striker yet, so we're giving you Mirko Cro Cop."
"Okay. How about now, Dana?"
"We're going to feed you a striker who's not as much out of his prime."
"Dana, can please has shitle tot now? I worked real hard! real hard!"
"Gabriel Gonzaga...grappler...and dangerous enough striker. Just enough to keep you on your toes."
ED SOARES VS. THE UFC CONTENDERS: THE COMIC
"The winner of Dan Henderson Vs. Michael Bisping will be the number one contender to Anderson's belt!"
"We welcome that matchup!"
"Good! I could use another to add to these!"
"When do I fight Anderson, Dana?"
"Well, Dan...it looks li..."
"Dan should have to fight Nate Marquardt first.....Meanwhile, Anderson wants to take challenges at Light Heavyweight!"
"Fuck you, you douche bag manager! Fighters don't need managers. God do I fucking hate douchebag managers! He'll fight who we tell him to!"
"Duhh....I'll fight anybody Dana!"
"What the fuck is going on, Dana?"
"Let's just see how this pans out, Dan...Don't worry!"
MEANWHILE, IN VITOR VILLAGE:
"Okay. Anderson Vs. Vitor in January!"
"But....I beat Franklin too....and I beat Vitor 3 years ago!!!!"
"We had no idea, LOL!"
"Coffee, Dan?"
"Go on...."
MEANWHILE, AT THE SILVA AND SOARES CAMP:
"Whisper, whisper, whisper, whisper"
"Elbow surgery! Sorry. No fight UFC 108. Later, LOL!"
"I will be Middleweight Champion!"
LATER THAT NIGHT:
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please make these a regular thing :D very entertaining
I'm old school hating Lesnar, I've been hating Lesnar since '08
by MicahW on Feb 9, 2010 2:20 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Haha
That was funny as shit. Rec’d
Supporting all Las Vegas MMA. Xtreme Couture FTMFW.
'09 is the year of the FW's.
Dos Santos was priceless.
Rec’d, sir.
"Someone is WRONG on the internet. What do you want me to do? LEAVE? Then they'll keep being wrong!"
-Randall Munroe
Hell yes
Dos Santos was definitely the best, Henderson a close 2nd
by Brian Hemminger on Feb 9, 2010 4:12 PM EST up reply actions
So...much.....win....
"And shepherds we shall be, for thee my Lord for thee, Power hath descended forth from thy hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out thy command, we shall flow a river forth to thee, and teeming with souls shall it ever be. In nomine patris, et filii...et spiritus sancti."
but dos santos hasn’t been asking for title shots. isn’t he waiting until big nog is out of the picture?
Goldie: "Michael Jordan-esque in his grappling skills is Travis Lutter."
Rogan: "No, no he's not. No."
I was sort of scratching my head at that too, it would of actually been funnier if he (or anyone at all) had ever even mentioned him getting a title shot. Maybe I’m over-thinking this but it just seems like it should make more sense to be really funny?
satire bends the truth a little. this site is very good at writing articles that contain 100% fact. satire was never meant to be a place to get your news (unfortunately, the daily show is what many young people believe to be the best news source). satirical articles, such as this, arent meant to educate, as someone who has never followed MMA wouldn’t get the article, but to those who know the story, its a humorous take on the situation.
I'm old school hating Lesnar, I've been hating Lesnar since '08
maybe if it was a humorous take on a real story, I’d agree. The Soares one is funny because that whole crazy storyline did really happen. The Dos Santos one just doesn’t make sense. It’s not like Junior has ever hilariously spouted off about title shots, while Soares/Anderson have been badmouthing contenders even tho they do eventually end up taking most of the fights
Goldie: "Michael Jordan-esque in his grappling skills is Travis Lutter."
Rogan: "No, no he's not. No."
Satire bends the truth with a humourous slant to make a point about an issue the author disagrees with, it doesn’t just make the entire story up with no basis. There just isn’t any basis for the Dos Santos bit at all, heck if anything it’s been exactly the opposite with him. The dude doesn’t want a title shot, he is waiting for Nog to have another run at it. I am sure my overthinking it is killing my “ha ha” response to that one but really it just doesn’t make much sense.
It's true
Junior has been content to just keep taking fights in the meantime, because he truly believes that Nog is the rightful HW champ. If Nog ends up winning the title, he’s gonna be in a very weird position
Supporting all Las Vegas MMA. Xtreme Couture FTMFW.
'09 is the year of the FW's.
by ElliotMatheny on Feb 9, 2010 9:45 PM EST up reply actions
High-larious
After seeing this though I think Dana is trying to build a fanbase for Dos Santos before he gets a “shitle tot.” Surprisingly enough the casuals don’t know who is and won’t know til he beats down a fan favorite. Like Rainbow Six did to Mike Swick.
greatness
..for some reason when I read the JDS comments my mind used Eyore’s voice from Winnie the Pooh…lol
"Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherf**ker" - Jules Winnfield
...
I didn’t think it was that funny…
We're just a million little gods causin' rain storms, turning every good thing to rust.
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