Sigh. Another day, another boring GSP fight. He didn't finish Josh Koscheck (again!) the same way he didn't finish Dan Hardy or Thiago Alves or Jon Fitch. Tsk tsk. For once he couldn't dry-hump his way to victory so he resorted to jabbing his opponent. Lame. He never takes risks, he's a safe fighter, he doesn't look to finish fights anymore. Come to think of it most of his UFC career has been a gigantic snoozer.....
UFC 48 - Sent everyone out of the arena in utter boredom after he knocked out Jay Hieron in 102 seconds.
UFC 54 - Choked out Frank Trigg, but Matt Hughes already did that twice. Highly unoriginal and dull.
UFC 56 - Bored Sean Sherk so badly, Sherk's nose exploded through one of GSP's smothering elbows. As you can see in the gif the guy clapping was relieved that dross was done with.
UFC 58 - Won a split decision over BJ Penn in one of the closest fights in UFC history. GSP took down Penn late in the fight to perhaps seal the victory. Takedowns are for Lay-and-Pray wimps, St. Pierre should've knocked him out.
UFC 65 - Conquered Matt Hughes, then the only man to defeat him. St. Pierre at long last was UFC Welterweight Champion. You know what rhymes with "champion"? Ambien.
UFC 79 - Found a new, boring way to defeat Hughes in the Rubber Match, by winning with the same submission he had lost by in his first fight against Matt. Yawn. Where's my Triple Decker Pecker Wrecker?
UFC 83 - Avenged his stunning loss to Matt Serra by safely planting his knees in Serra's body. Since Serra was not knocked from his senses with punches, this goes down as the lamest KO in the history of the UFC.
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UFC 87 - Covered Jon Fitch like a blanket. This blanket was filled with purple and red stains but that got fixed through surgery.
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UFC 94 - BJ Penn was so tired from trying to prevent GSP from smothering him to death that his corner said "F*** this S***. He didn't come to fight. Come on BJ let's go home!" before round 5. Oh yeah, Greasegate also happened, presumably to lessen the dryness in the humping Penn was going to receive.
UFC 100 - Knocked down Thiago Alves but only won by decision. Not only did he win by decision, his groin was pulled and he ignored Greg Jackson's command to "hit him with your groin", undeniable evidence that GSP is the ultimate "play-it-safe" fighter.
UFC 111 - Failed to rip Dan Hardy's arm from its socket. Rousimar Palhares demands a catchweight fight with Hardy so he can remove it the way one would rip a branch off a tree. Another decision? Yawn.
UFC 124 - You know what happened....
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If we conveniently ignore GSP's finishes and then take decisions out-of-context, I'd say he's not an exciting fighter at all. And his opponent is who? Jake Shields? Captain Decision himself? That Toronto card is going to SUCK. No wonder St. Pierre's nickname is "Rush" because when he fights you want to rush for the remote to watch something else.










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