Patrick, while I'm sure the plan is to get a few wins and come back to the UFC for the Montreal card, I have an alternate offer. Come and walk my dogs for me. I understand there is quite the pay difference, but you don't need trainers or a lengthy camp for dog walking. All that is required are poop bags and liver treats, and I will provide those for you. While you are here we can practice how you work in the guard. That rear naked choke Belcher put you in? I would be down for some of that. How good are you on your back? I would love to find out.
Gabe, it seems like you are one of those guys who bounces around all the time happy as can be. I need a person like you to do my landscaping/snow removal. It's a little colder here than it is in Brazil, so I suggest you start growing your hair longer. We can make snow angels, drink Gatorade and you can run into my fence to amuse me. It will be wonderful.
Rules of the Gallo household for fighters:
1. No wall and stall.
2. Lay and pray is okay but may lead to standup.
3. North south is fun for a while but please eventually transition to mount.
4. Stand and bang scores points, but don't let this go to a judges
5. Elbows aren't okay, chokes are highly encouraged.
6. If I give up my back, take it and sink the hooks in.
Originally posted in all it's glory at Unintelligent Defense