MMA as perceived by Penny Arcade: "We rented a slew of videos and prepared ourselves for...

MMA as perceived by Penny Arcade:

"We rented a slew of videos and prepared ourselves for displays of incredible prowess. I don't know what we were expecting, exactly, some Wing Chun shit perhaps, but the matches we saw tended to follow a very specific pattern:

1. One dude, let's call him "He Who Is About To Lose," tries to rock some Wing Chun shit.
2. The other dude grabs this leg, and proceeds to bend his opponent's body into a shape we no longer recognize as human.

Reference the comic above for a detailed analysis of the rest of the match. Part of it is almost certainly that we (this is the greater, gamer-encompassing we, but also anyone who watches movies ever) have a somewhat warped idea of what human bodies can tolerate in terms of hit points. Even by those standards, we were not prepared to see how short the distance is from Point A to Point B, where Point A is a human specimen in peak condition and Point B is a wholly sundered being."

8 months ago Graven Image 7 comments 0 recs |

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

Since that was unreadable

by Graven Image on Jul 15, 2009 2:40 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Seems a bit of an outdated take, but I dont know what DVDs they were watching. I also understand that it only takes one viewing for Joe Son’s balls to be forever ingrained in your brain.

by Graven Image on Jul 15, 2009 2:44 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

…. well they got the tattoo’s right.

by Nick Thomas on Jul 15, 2009 2:45 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs

That’s the first thing I noticed with the EA MMA logo, too. I was like, “Srsly? We had to go with tribal tattoos?”

by loboplata on Jul 15, 2009 2:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

God, I hate Penny Arcade.

"I see him beating Anderson Silva. I see him picking him apart. Him at a 131 years old...(trails off)." - Tito Ortiz on Vitor Belfort at Affliction:DOR

by Rundownloser on Jul 15, 2009 4:17 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs