BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest III
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 8, 2009 10:23 PM EDT
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Im back with the third edition of the BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest!
xFenixKnightx , the current BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest Champion, holds the most prestigious JPEG award ever made..
beery_pbr currently holds the Satire Jpeg belt by placing second in the last FunnyBone event..
DUGASWARRIOR doesn't have a belt, but at least he has a JPEG necklace and a stick-on beard that could hide any non-existent chin..
steak_knife, DUGASWARRIOR , and mma_dude all have special awards..
Aside from those chick-magnet-fashion-statements also known as the Funnybone JPEG Belts, there are also gonna be new special prizes to be won, so put up your entries and join now!
Who will prevail this time?
Will our champs be able to hold on to their belts?
Will the past title holders regain their lost glory and capture the belts once again?
or will the up and comers finally live up to their potential?
Will any of the BloodyElbow staff be brave enough to enter the FunnyBone octagon to challenge for a JPEG belt?
These questions will be answered soon enough..
For those of you who weren't here before,
The object of the game is really simple. Whoever makes the funniest line about the picture chosen, becomes the NEW BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest Champion!
So how do you join? Just place a caption about the picture in the comments section.
So how do you win? After people have commented, the post will be updated and There will be a poll on the few best lines in the comments section.. we, the users will then pick the best caption and decide who becomes the BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest Champion.
Simple enough? lets get started.
With the contest being close to UFC 96, i decided to go with something a bit related to it..
the BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest topic, and this edition's butt of all jokes are,
Put on your thinking caps and start.. Crack a joke or a witty line, roast, insult, poke fun, whatever.. As long as its funny, then its all good..
The person with the funniest caption becomes the new, BloodyElbow FunnyBone Contest Champion!
Which is the best caption?
option 1:
Hey, that was cool… Now let`s try that "fisting"-thing you keep talking about!
option 2:
Push HARDER Brandon, I can still feel $kala's nose up my ass.
option 3:
Advanced Weight Cutting Techniques
-by Brandon Veraside-effects may include: stomach pain, instantaneous gassing, constipation, tentativeness, and loss of fans.
option 4:
If this doesn’t work on her… you can always use a coat hanger!
option 5:
Quaid……Start the reactor…..Free Mars…
option 6:
Maybe removing this rib’ll help your flexibility when ducking the UFC Welter Weights..
option 7:
Finally! After all these months of trying we’ve been blessed with our own little miracle.
option 8:
Update: the poll has been added..i decided to change the poll a bit and put the choices in the actual post so that it would accommodate entries that have more than one line.. so there.. VOTE VOTE VOTE!!!
notes: Props to Benicio for suggesting this picture.. JPEG belts and special prizes are from random sites from google image searches.. The banner is from me, weoweoweo..
If you like this contest, rec the post so that more people would be able to join. :)
and again, This is just a fanpost by a dumb guy trying to be funny.. So dont take it too seriously. This also means that the bloodyelbow.com staff dont necessarily endorse, and have nothing to do with any of the offensive/insulting/whatever statements or views that may be found here..
The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Bloody Elbow readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Bloody Elbow editors or staff.
117 comments
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Comments
Past winners:
Steak_knife won part 1 with the caption,
xFenixKnightx won part 2 with,
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
Dude, you’re missing another rib… Exactly HOW MANY ladies do you have?
by Monday Morning Martial Artist on Mar 3, 2009 7:35 AM EST reply actions
-Just rub his belly and he’ll stop growling at you.
-The sequel to Alvin and the Chipmunks is doomed.
-Sadly, this is the most effective striking Brandon Vera has exibited in 2 years.
-Who’s hungwy in his widdle tummy?
Keep firing Assholes!
-Sadly, this is the most effective striking Brandon Vera has exibited in 2 years.good one…
"They called him the axe-murderer because he was murdering chumps. They should have been calling him the chump-murderer..." Rampage Jackson (commentating on the fighting abilities of Wanderlei "F#ck Chuck" Silva.)
by BlueberryMuffin on Mar 3, 2009 3:27 PM EST up reply actions
“I’m pretty sure this isn’t how the Donkey Punch is done…”
If you're not submitting, you're just rolling around with another guy.
by BJJDenver on Mar 3, 2009 11:31 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
So far all those captions are awful.
"My job is a decision-making job, and as a result, I make a lot of decisions." --George W. Bush, The Decider, Lancaster, Pa., Oct. 3, 2007
See what you made me do...
If you're not submitting, you're just rolling around with another guy.
by BJJDenver on Mar 3, 2009 12:03 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
well to be fair, the picture now is much harder to caption than the first two..
..and i dont see any funny entry from you here..
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 4, 2009 12:17 AM EST up reply actions
A little constipated, Jake? Here, this is an old village Phillipine laxative. Hiiiiyyyyyaaa!!!
Being with me is like being with a broken tampon. There's no strings attached.
by Gogoplatapus on Mar 3, 2009 4:05 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
"Is this what a strike looks like?"
Brad Ziegler had a scoreless inning streak. Brad Ziegler had not met BJ Upton.
Jake: "Hell, I dunno."
Brad Ziegler had a scoreless inning streak. Brad Ziegler had not met BJ Upton.
Remember: don't forget to slap her in the ovary.
I will play my game beneath the spin light.
by Eugene Schelfaut on Mar 3, 2009 7:26 PM EST reply actions
Advanced Weight Cutting Techniques
-written by brandon vera
side-effects may include: stomach pain, instantaneous gassing, constipation, tentativeness, and loss of fans.
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
(wait make that..)
.
.
Advanced Weight Cutting Techniques
-by brandon vera
side-effects may include: stomach pain, instantaneous gassing, constipation, tentativeness, and loss of fans.
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 4, 2009 12:19 AM EST up reply actions
JS: Hey Brandon, check out my killer abs. The new Bowflex I got for Christmas has been working wond *gets interrupted*
BV: Awe how cute SMACK STFU! Dude, nobody cares and no one’s going to see you on MIA Elite XC
JS: Well, actually I’m with StrikeForce now. And…aren’t you working undercard matches now? Theres some “Truth” for ya buddy.
BV: SO, you know they always show at least 1 or 2 undercard matches on the PPV’s, ass!
JS: Sure buddy whatever you say, oh and Jon Fitch sais hello. :)
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
dude thats funny.. but How do i put that in a poll option? haha. :D
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 4, 2009 8:03 PM EST up reply actions
No worries man, just skip it. No big deal. :)
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
by xFenixKnightx on Mar 4, 2009 9:17 PM EST up reply actions
hahaha.
that was actually a problem even before you posted your entry.. Im trying to think of a way to make a poll that could accomodate entries with more than one line.. cause some are funny too but have several lines..
(my entry is like that, but i dont know if people find it funny) haha.
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 4, 2009 10:52 PM EST up reply actions
Have you ever been slapped in the jejunum?
by WhiteyBarrington on Mar 4, 2009 2:51 PM EST reply actions
good one! haha. :D
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 4, 2009 8:02 PM EST up reply actions
Quaid……Start the reactor…..Free Mars…
"Negative, negative. I gotta stay lean and lightning and ready to fight." Capt. H.M. Murdock
This already has my vote.
"I see him beating Anderson Silva. I see him picking him apart. Him at a 131 years old...(trails off)." - Tito on Belfort at Affliction:DOR
by Rundownloser on Mar 4, 2009 10:56 PM EST up reply actions
Damn it. Good one.
Contributor Emeritus - BloodyElbow.com
by Chris Nelson on Mar 5, 2009 12:35 AM EST up reply actions
cmon chris join in! haha. :D
i’m gonna start a rally to convince the BE staff to join in so we can see how funny and creative you guys could be.. :)
…now if only i can convince people to gather around, make signs, or throw rocks.
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 5, 2009 1:05 AM EST up reply actions
vera:
The Witchdoctor says if you fart while I slap you like this, Tito Ortiz’s head will explode!
can I do multiple entries?
Be water, my friend.
http://martialfarts.fightlinker.com
sure go ahead! :D
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 5, 2009 9:25 AM EST up reply actions
Vera: Bitch! * SMACK * Go put a shirt on!
Shields: AHHH! WTF MAN?!! You’re just jelous of my killer abs and cool hair!
Vera: PFFT! You mean that douchey hair?
Shields: Still jelous!
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
Vera: “I knew it! You ate that last donut!”
Shields: “Did not!”
Vera: "Did too! It’s… right THERE!
by Monday Morning Martial Artist on Mar 6, 2009 3:07 AM EST reply actions
What a bunch of sad entries. Even mine sucked. :(
C’mon guys! I’ve laughed harder at BJ’s rubbergaurd attempts.
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
dude, why you gotta dis. there’s some decent creativity up there. i know worked hard on my entries for at least 10 min. I think you should just use your Golberg quote about Matt and Mark Hughes.
:(
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
by xFenixKnightx on Mar 6, 2009 3:18 PM EST up reply actions
Finally! After all these months of trying we’ve been blessed with our own little miracle.
by Headkick on Mar 6, 2009 2:57 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Ok
THIS one made me lol!
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
by xFenixKnightx on Mar 6, 2009 3:17 PM EST up reply actions
well you guys wanted a challenge! :D
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 6, 2009 8:48 PM EST up reply actions
Bah, I still like that picture I suggested =P
A man should never waste an opportunity to keep his mouth shut.
that 'might' not go to waste.. hint hint.. ;)
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 6, 2009 11:11 PM EST up reply actions
Jake
Push on my stomach while I pull the stick out of my ass
Bolts from the Blue // "Game over." - Jamal Williams
Bloody Elbow // "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats." - H.L. Mencken
hahaha. did you make that?
maybe that could be like the last option or something.. Cause i agree, sometimes the captions arent needed.. (see gay aoki pics) :)
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 7, 2009 1:19 AM EST up reply actions
ladies and gents...
we have a WINNAR!
Be water, my friend.
http://martialfarts.fightlinker.com
by Martial Farts on Mar 7, 2009 2:20 AM EST up reply actions
good idea, but epic fail at photoshop. :p
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 8, 2009 10:49 PM EDT up reply actions
I'll add the poll tomorrow (cause im kinda tired now), so you still have time to get your entries in..
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
lol
Mike Goldberg: "You know Joe, When Matt and his brother Mark Hughes were growing up, they would pound each other behind the barn."
by xFenixKnightx on Mar 8, 2009 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions
Second that.
Bolts from the Blue // "Game over." - Jamal Williams
Bloody Elbow // "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats." - H.L. Mencken
it’s really wrong and inappropriate.. but it’s getting votes, so i guess it deserves the nomination.
http://weoweoweo.deviantart.com/
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 9, 2009 1:34 AM EDT up reply actions
I still think the results are skewed because my entry was being shown as just text when the voting opened.
Bolts from the Blue // "Game over." - Jamal Williams
Bloody Elbow // "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats." - H.L. Mencken
well at first i thought it was a bit unfair to them cause they entered text captions too.
cause if someone photoshoped their Caption well and it looked funny, it would have an unfair advantage cause it would be judged by how good it looks too, and not just on how funny the line is.. That’s why i initially placed it as text.
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 9, 2009 9:36 PM EDT up reply actions
Can’t we just have a contest of the internet’s cutest/wittiest kitten pictures??
C’mon weo, I’m sure I speak for everyone at BE.
If you're not submitting, you're just rolling around with another guy.
goddammit denver i hate cats!
(good thing you wouldnt see my “awwwwww” face everytime i see those funny/cute pics) hahaha. :D
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 9, 2009 10:29 PM EDT up reply actions
Was the “advanced weight cutting techniques” not a rip-off of my own comment just a few ahead of it?
cause youre the only one allowed to make vera and weight cutting jokes?
how about the several people who made vera not having good striking jokes?
how about those who made vera being cut from the ufc jokes?
those are the common jokes to be expected coming from a vera picture.. just like how tito’s pic got lots of jenna jameson and big headed jokes, bisping getting a lot of british jokes, and leben with the steroids jokes.. those aren’t “rip offs” and you didnt invent them..
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 10, 2009 2:35 AM EDT up reply actions
Yep, I was like the second Vera striking comment…thats kind of moot anyways after his last fight, he really looked good compared to those past performances.
I think originality is where it’s at, not the obvious captions.
by Kaleb Kelchner on Mar 10, 2009 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions
Sure but weren’t they all different angles on the same joke theme? I’m not saying I invented it, but if one person already uses it, and another person just basically cuts the exact same joke without any slightly different angle…
I guess I read through all the comments before I made mine, assuming that doubling up on jokes doesn’t exactly help anyone. Further, I’d think that the first joke would be the one to get chosen, but whatever. Maybe a simple “advanced weight cutting techniques” was funnier than my more elaborate “Brandon Vera aiding Jake Shields as he applies his controversial ‘large intestine removing weight cutting technique’”
You hit the nail on the head, your original was just to wordy compared to the short punchy one that made it.
You should just look at it as, you were close, and learn from it if you enter the next one. I always come up with some funny ones after a while, I come back and then see that people have had similar ideas. You really gotta think out of the box.
by Kaleb Kelchner on Mar 10, 2009 6:28 PM EDT up reply actions
for me, its not really who came first or what..
cause when you put a picture of a fighter, you wont be able to avoid having the same kind of jokes.. Tito is with jenna and is big headed, therefore lots of jokes about that… also like how chuck norris is bad ass.. therefore, there are lots of bad ass jokes about him..
its not about being first or second person to bring up a certain topic, its about being funnier and more creative on that topic because those really cant be avoided..
by Anton Tabuena on Mar 10, 2009 10:30 PM EDT up reply actions
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